WHILE WALKING ALONG A QUIET PLACE WITH THE NATURE

I was walking along a quiet place somewhere in the town. Suddenly, I found myself somewhere that left me amused. The magnificent view, tall hills all around me, I could see nothing than fields all around. Well, some small houses made it feel more pleasing as there was no feeling of loneliness in my heart. Everything around were making me feel so good. No one was around yet I wasn't lonely at all.

Before my mind embraced this beauty of the surrounding, I was all confused about things. Now, with the glimpse of time, I realized something. The thing for which I was running for wasn't mine at the first place itself. I knew this from the very beginning but it’s just I didn't want to confront it. Actually, whatever I thought of was just a silly dream and how could it come true? After all, dreams are just a dream. They vanish as soon as we wake up from the sleep.

Well, I’m happy; I dared to confront the truth. Though it took me a long time and I guess it somewhat ruined me but what is life for? Isn't it for making mistakes and taking lessons? Now I guarantee, I’ll never make such silly mistakes ever again.

It’s pretty hilarious! Maybe it’s human nature, not giving up on things you want. Claiming right over those things that were never yours and will never be yours.

When I remember my silly acts, I want to pretend like. Whh..aa..t? No! That was not me. How could I act  that stupid? Was I that stupid?

Maybe the desire of making it mine made me act that stupid.

Nevertheless, everything ends up well. Although I can’t give up on my desires, my one and only dream that I wanted that badly. I acted strong enough. I confronted the truth. Instead of running after it worthlessly, I decided to give up on it. The decision was harsh but it was necessary for me to live a meaningful life and to gain the self respect that I had lost somewhere between my stupid deeds.

Maybe it’s time to say, whatever I did till today will be my history tomorrow. Tomorrow will come with new beginning, new dreams, and new responsibilities. I’m strong enough to bury my history and embrace my tomorrow. For the fact, I’m not a coward; I’m the brave warrior of my own life.

WAS THE DECISION CORRECT ?

From that particular time when I took the decision I had this feeling of restlessness growing bigger and stronger. I knew the decision that I took was wrong from the beginning itself. But I had no option than making the decision. Actually there was no choice to be made. If anyone was in my position then they would probably be able to figure out how important that decision was.

I can’t deny the good aspects of the decision made. But I can’t even ignore how harsh it has been on me.

Was the decision correct for me? What were my dreams? What I really wanted? The things I thought would happen…..

 What I asked for to happen...Was that a little more? Was it more than I deserved?

Maybe I got something more than I deserved from the beginning itself so I had big dreams.

I must not have had lived in dreams. Not everyone in this world has right to dream especially when it comes to people like me. I must have had restricted my mind from dreaming.

Although the decision made was not the correct one, I wanted to continue in the path that destiny preserved for me. But No! Even that path, that dream has become just a dream. It has become that blue sky which I can see and dream of touching but can’t do it because it’s high, high above me.

Now the determination for attaining the dream has gone. Don’t know how many people will I hurt? They still have hope on me but its only me who knows the determination and hope inside me has torn out leaving it scattered all over.